I’d like for you to take a few moments to do a quick exercise, using your imagination. It will be easy to read through these scenarios quickly, so I want to encourage you to take your time and read each sentence with purpose and reflection. Here’s the exercise: Imagine how you would respond if you worked in these two professional environments.
- You show up but no one knows your name. No one welcomes you or even notices you. You have no chances to share about who you are, or to connect to any of your co-workers. You don’t see or meet anyone who asks about or respects your values, culture, race, or beliefs. The only attention you receive is based on the final outcome or product.
- A workplace where you are welcomed warmly, by name, as you walk into the building. You have time and space to connect with colleagues: to get to know more about them, and they about you. You see yourself reflected in conversation, learning, and social circles. This is an environment that places value on the process of getting to the outcome and expresses excitement for things that are learned along the way.
I can’t remember a time when I’ve asked our teachers and staff to do this exercise where they preferred scenario #1. Both scenarios are a bit exaggerated, and by no means am I calling out any school or individual guilty of such a work climate. The point of the exaggeration is to illuminate the importance of belonging—when you have it and when you don’t. We do our best work when we feel a sense of connection and belonging in our community. There is a safety in this feeling that allows us to be our fullest selves and contribute our best gifts to those around us.
It’s no different for our students. When the basic need for belonging and connection is not met in a school or a classroom, it’s almost impossible for them to do their best learning or be their best self. At my school, St. Andrew’s Episcopal in Austin, Texas, we use the strengths of both our SEL (Social and Emotional Learning) and DEIB (Diversity, Equity, Inclusion and Belonging) programs to help students feel a sense of belonging in our community. Here are some of the intentional ways our school works to help develop this sense of belonging.
Welcoming and Greeting: Younger students are greeted by an adult at carpool every morning and all K-5th grade homeroom teachers and many 6th-12th grade teachers wait by the door to welcome students as they enter the classroom to begin the school day. I believe that greeting each student, by name, as they arrive to learn is one of the best things we can do to help them feel seen and connected.
Morning Meetings and Closing Circles: Our Lower School uses Responsive Classroom techniques for starting and ending the school day. One of the techniques teachers use in Morning Meetings is the greet and share. Students greet one another every day and usually have a chance to share something significant about themselves or those close to them. Using this technique to both begin and end the school day allows students to feel a sense of belonging and connection to one another through sharing. Middle and Upper School advisory acts as a similar connection point in the older grades. It is our hope that when a child shares something unique and is listened to and heard by classmates, it will create a much deeper sense of feeling seen, heard, and respected by everyone.
Affinity Groups: St. Andrew’s prides itself on being a formational community. One of the ways we help form our young people is through the ongoing process of identity development. Our school believes in the ways affinity groups embrace and encourage the different parts of their identity. Spending time in small groups of people who identify in this same way can allow stories and experiences to be shared in a space that may feel more understanding.
Curriculum Audits: If student learning only represents the dominant culture in our schools, many students miss out on a sense of belonging and feeling represented. St. Andrew’s has used Teaching Tolerance standards in curriculum audits to make sure students see and feel their race and culture being represented in the learning. Whether it is books, activities, projects or speakers, we remain committed to helping every one of our students see and hear themselves in our curriculum.
Class Belief Statement: Our students set their own class standards in the first week of school. Many lower school classes recite this statement after the Pledge of Allegiance in the morning. This is a way for students to use their ideas to set behavioral and group goals, which provide clear boundaries and expectations for students throughout the year. You can use these statements on teams, in larger groups, on the playground or in the cafeteria. When students use their voice to set standards, it creates a better sense of belonging for them in that space of learning.
Advisory: Advisory time helps students form connection and belonging with both peers and adults. Advisory period is a time when the same group of Middle and Upper School students, led by one or two adults, meets regularly to talk about and include everyone in community issues. Being seen and heard from by the same group of people throughout the school year usually creates a safe space to be their authentic selves and feel connected to this small group and our greater community.
Student Voice: Our Middle and High Schools highly emphasize student leadership and student voice. Both divisions have developed leadership opportunities for students to use their voice in continual improvement of our community culture. Whether through mentoring roles, volunteer roles, elected positions or larger groups, if something makes our students feel excluded, unwelcome, or anxious in any way, every one of them has the opportunity to raise this concern and do something positive to help.
Restorative Discipline Practices: We have discussions about our discipline policies almost every year. In order to help students feel cared for and valued, we’ve adopted a restorative process that aims to support skill growth when students have missteps. If a mistake is made, when possible, our process tries to include three restorative steps: why you made the choice, how it impacted our community and others, and how you can repair the broken trust or damage caused by these choices. In doing this extended work after a misstep, our hope is the student feels valued and senses the belief we have in their better self. Punitive discipline can lead to students feeling disassociated and disconnected with a teacher, a classroom or the school. Our aim in Restorative Discipline is to keep them feeling that sense of belonging to our school, rather than distance from it.
I believe the opportunities I’ve just listed can be adopted by any school with minimal change in a school day. The only ideas that may need ongoing training are the Morning Meetings and the Restorative Discipline techniques. The other ideas require enthusiastic faculty taking the lead and moving the initiatives forward. If these things align with your school’s values and you have faculty interested in learning how to implement them, reach out to the Heart of Character team for support. Many of the best educators and practitioners in this field are readily available to encourage and train you in growing this very important need for our students.